My Experience as a Non-Member at BYU

The following post is written by Joshua O'Hare, a Junior at BYU studying film. Josh is from Oroville, California and is a non-LDS student. 

My senior year of high school, I had four different colleges that I was considering: Chico State in Northern California, Biola in Southern California, Berkeley in Central California, and BYU in Utah.  They each had their merits and their…not so savory qualities.  Chico State is cheap and close to home which is good. And bad. It also doesn’t have exactly what I want to study.  Biola is a great University and has a film program. Good. But it’s expensive.  $30,000 tuition. Ouch.  Berkeley. Beautiful campus, incredible diversity, great curriculum. Still expensive. Also, it’s kind of a party school which just isn’t my thing.  Lastly, BYU.  Nice area, new place, nice people, good curriculum, great price.  But Mormons. Bleh.  When considering what my path should be this was a big factor.  I had Mormon friends. I knew a little about them. But did I want to live with them? Did I want to be the infidel?  I finally made the decision to come to BYU because I figured that with all the other good things, I could live with the Mormon thing.  I’m glad I made that choice.

I have had great experiences here in Provo.  As well as learning the scholastics in class, I’ve also learned a lot about myself.  My first semester was not very fun.  I had no friends.  I had not moved out here with anyone and I wasn’t meeting people through church like everyone else was.  I had my roommates but they had their own things to do and two of them were from Utah so they went home all the time.  The best thing I ever did here was talk to someone from my FHE group.  Once we became friends, I had someone to talk to and have fun with.  And through this connection I made more friends.  I met a lot of people in my ward and started going to ward activities and meeting new people that I really loved. 

One of the most important things to do in college is make friends.  We’re not meant to go it alone.  Though classes and intellectual learning is extremely important, the social aspect of college does not have to be a detriment.  I found that my studies got better just because my outlook improved.  I began enjoying class a lot more and paying more attention.  My days seemed to go by quicker because now my weekends were filled with friends and fun rather than sitting around watching TV.  I didn’t tell anyone I wasn’t a member for a few months though.  I did this just because I wanted them to know me for who I was and not know me as the non-member guy.  Once I told them, my friends didn’t care.  They were just interested in why I was here and what I believed.  It didn’t change the relationship at all and it was nice to know that they knew and didn’t c
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My experience here at BYU has been socially and intellectually engaging.  Though many think that all non-members go into BYU to come out as members, I have remained the same guy and don’t expect a change.  While it sometimes feels like everyone is trying to convert me, I know that I am accepted here no matter what.  My friends like me for me and not for my religion.  A good thing that I did before coming to BYU was independent research on the LDS Church.  It helped me understand the people here better and the culture shock was not as big of a deal.  I’ve also grown in my own faith because of the challenges that are made against my beliefs being a non-member. 

Looking back now, coming to BYU was a great decision I made.  It has improved me in many different areas and I really believe it is where I’m supposed to be!

Joshua O'Hare